Geoff: Y-You and I used to do this thing where like the Chronicle would post like, Geoff: “Early tickets to see a movie!” Gus: Oh, god…
Geoff: And we would go stand in line at a store for 4 hours, so we could see a movie for free early. Geoff: And so we saw The Punisher early,
Gus: Oh, God… Geoff: The Thomas Jane Punisher,
Michael: Fuck yeah! Geoff: And Gus had just moved back from Puerto Rico,
Ryan: No, no fuck yeah. Geoff: And the opening shot,
Michael: Oh, fuck yeah! Geoff: It’s like this gorgeous, Caribbean paradise,
Michael: A beach? Geoff: And it says, “Aguadilla, Puerto Rico”. And Gus goes, *sound of chair scooting back* Geoff: “WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! I JUST LIVED THERE FOR A YEAR AND A HALF!” “‘N’ THAT IS NOT ANYWHERE NEAR IT!! WHERE ARE THE TRASH BAGS?! WHY IS THE ELECTRICITY WORKING?!?!” Geoff: And he like, went on this rant and everybody in the theater was like, “what the fuck?” *Everyone laughs*
Gus: I, uh… that’s not even the worst I’ve ever done in a theater; Gus: One time, we had to go see Bewitched, remember the Bewitched rewake (remake)? Brandon: With Will Ferrell?
Ryan: *indistinct noise* Gus: I got- I got really drunk before the movie started ((but not cheesemaster drunk)),
Michael: Yeah, you did. Gus: And then I snuck in uh… bottles of Coke that were filled with alcohol, and um… Gus: I just kept drinking and people were laughing at it, and having a good time as people do at the movies, Gus: But I was so drunk and angry I started screaming at the movie audience; Gus: I was like, “WHAT ARE YOU ALL LAUGHING AT?! THIS MOVIE’S TERRIBLE!”
*Everyone is laughing while Michael says “Jesus Christ”* *Everyone is still laughing*
Gus: I had to get dragged out of that movie theater-
Michael: Whaaat?? *STATIC* Brandon: I almost got beat up in a movie theater. Brandon: Was watching Tropic Thunder, fucking asshole in the row in front of me kept answering his phone, Brandon: And obnoxiously talking to somebody to the point where I know you’re not doing this to convenient; Brandon: I know you’re just like, trying to piss everyone of us off. Brandon: So finally, I got so angry that I was like, “Can you get off your fucking phone?” Brandon: And the guy stood up, looked at me, and was like, “You want to take this outside? I’ll beat the shit outta you. I’ll beat the shit outta you!” Brandon: And I just kinda stood there and didn’t do anything; and I was just like, “Okay, okay, okay, ok.” Brandon: And he walks away, gets out of the theater, and as I’m leaving this guy comes up to me. Brandon: Kinda like, you know, looks… y’know, really nerdy shirt. Brandon: And he was just like, “I woulda had your back, bro. I woulda had your back.” *Hands slam on the table* *Everyone laughs*
Brandon: FUCKING. BULLSHIT. *Everyone still laughs*
Brandon: If I got punched in the face, nobody would’ve done a thing. Michael: Yeah.
Ryan: Alright, but he would have called the ambulance.
Brandon: I was the people’s! Michael: He would’ve.
Jeremy: Yeah, yeah. Ryan: He would’ve been there-
Michael: He would’ve called 911. *overlapping chatter*
Geoff: He meant- he would’ve found your back a– th– wh– where it was thrown in the woods and put it back on you. Brandon: It was immediately one of those things as soon as it, you’re like: “This was NOT a great idea.” “How am I… ssuss…” *Gus’s soft “Yeah.”*
Ryan: What’chu (what you) do is, “Yeah, let’s take it outside!” And he leaves and you just sit back down. *someone’s “Yeah, that’s right.”* Gus: He goes out one way, you go out the other exit. Like the fire exit. *multiple chuckles*
Gus: Just like, run to your car. Gus: j’st (just)… don’t look back. Ryan: And then hit him with it. (Gus agrees with “Yeah.”)
Michael: Jesu- *STATIC* ((Fun fact: the word like had been said a total of 15 times!))