Burnie: If you ever go to conventions, first year conventions are just notoriously terrible. Gus and I one time went to a convention, and I remember that it was the same week that Halo 3 released. And I know that because… we went to a convention in Florida where it was the first year event, and there was less exhibitors at this event than there were– I mean there were more exhibitors than attendees at the event. More exhibitors… Like, there was like, 5 people walking around on the floor. Y’know, and Gus and I are just sitting in the booth..
Barbara: I hope they had a lot of money.. I mean, it was really a lot of pressure on those attendees. Everyone was like (Creepy “Please come to my booth” type moaning sound) when they would come by. So, Gus and I busted out an Xbox 360 and we played Halo 3 the entire time. And they gave us shit about it. Do you remember that?
Gus: Yeah. They were like “So you guys are just gonna sit on the floor and play Halo- like, play a video game the entire time?” It’s like “There’s nobody fucking here!”
Gus: It was so dead, we actually left. Gus: We went to a store, we bought a TV and an Xbox and Halo
Bernie: That is true!
Gus: And then we brought it back! Gavin: So you both left together? Gus: We- Yeah! and it was like, there was nobody there!
Barbra: Did you sell anything there? Burnie: I think we sold like, one shirt, maybe.
Gus: Yeah. CRRSH Gus: The worst is, and I was talking about this earlier, is when there’s like a sneeze guard, and people point over the guard at what they want. Gavin: Dude! I went to Verts the other day, and she had one hand on the Plexiglas, and her entire arm was over and she was doing this. Gus: [doing an impression] “Yeah, I want- I want THIS!” Gus: Oh, is there no word for LETTUCE?! (Everyone laughs) Do we not have a fucking common language you can speak?! You don’t have to FUCKING point at it! Burnie: To be fair, they have a lot of kinds of lettuce at that restaurant. There’s like, three different kinds. Gavin: Do you know what they should do? Number them. Gavin: [Pretending to be there]: “I want some two and some nine… and a squirt of three.” Gus: Some people just shouldn’t reach over that fucking thing. Burnie: Also, you know what other people shouldn’t do?
Gavin: It should to to the ceiling! Gus: It happens at MOD Pizza, it happens at Chipotle, it happens at fucking Subway! I’m sick of it! Burnie: I taught my kids this at a very early age… If you’re out anywhere, don’t touch the fucking glass! It doesn’t matter what it is. Gus: Mmm-hmm. Burnie: If it’s glass, and you’re not drinking out of it, don’t fucking touch it! Don’t fucking put your hands on the glass to open the door, don’t– when you’re like, at the doughnut shop, put your fucking greasy finger on the glass going [doing an impression] “I want that one with the chocolate.” Y’know, just don’t do that! CRRSH *Outro music*