*wapoosh* Top of the mornin’ to ya laddies! My name is Jacksepticeye, and welcome back to Ben and Ed: Blood Party! We went through the fire and the flames last time, We did a lot of crazy shit. Wait, We went through “Laser Tunnels,” now we’re going through “Laser Tunnel”? …Great naming scheme! But the lasers suck, because the lasers chop off teeny tiny parts of you, And they’re really hard to avoid! Oh no… Okay, that’s fine, just do your little- Gah! You see what I mean?! You SEE?! Ya see what I’m talkin’ about?! Do ya pick up what I’m puttin’ down? Oh, yahahaha! Look at his little hop! He’s so cuuute! Oh god, be careful! Music’s very nice though, I like that.
[slow techno] DON’T like that part so much- Oh god, I only have one arm. Haha! Ya fricken did it! Nothing’s slowing me down. Woahhh, the whole game kinda freaked out there for a second. Okay. Nothing TOO- [laughing] bad! It wasn’t even the fricken lasers that got me, it was just my own stupidity. Hup! Hoap! Oh no… Am I alive? I’m in HALF! OH! I didn’t even know that could HAPPEN! Oh- I can still move! I can’t, like, go in directions, but I can still jump! [giggles] Okay, that’s awesome! Hap! God, it’s so hard to control him sometimes. Huaaa! Whop! There we gohhh. You’re supposed to take your time with parts of this, but taking your time is BORING. I like to power through. It makes me feel REAL good about myself- Oh Jesus… Ahh! No! How do I even DO this?! I can do it though. Watch. Hup! You just go out over. Oh god, I only have one fucking leg now. That’s fine, that’s all you need! Dah, I lost an arm though. Did I- Did I need that? I dunno if I needed that one. AHH! No you fuckin’ don’t! I’ma just keep goin’. Look at this! Who ever said you needed all that garbage? All those other parts of your body? It’s just slowing ya down is all! [laughing] I can’t believe I did that, as well. [laughs] Alright, [exhale] easy does it here now. Can you- Can you throw? [kr-splat] Did he actually, throw it OVER? Did you ACTUALLY throw it OVER?! Is that actually supposed to do anything? Can you connect to your body again? There we go. I don’t even know if that does anything. I’m just gonna go over here. I’m gonna bypass everything. I’m gonna be a happy little zombie. Watch. [derpy laugh] Right, hup! Oh, you’re baaad. [boom] I- I could fuckin’ TELL, ’cause it said “DIE” on you. Nothing that says “DIE” on it is any good. Okay, I need two people, apparently, for that. But I am only one! I’m only one Jackaboy. There can only BE one Jackaboy! Okay, easy does it. You just got to get to the very edge. The very edge- This is not gonna end well for me. [boom] [nervous laugh] That scared me. Okay. I still got my fish. I lost an arm, but arms are fine. Arms are okay to lose. [softly] oh god… Haah! Okay, I can’t do that. [inhale] UUu… I wonder if I could just glitch the system and jump on the outside of the whole thing. Hup! HOW do I circumvent you? OHAOH! Like that! I learned something today. God, this is so nerve-rackin’. Why you do me like this, game? I’m trying to have a good time. And look at, everything’s so peaceful out there! Hey, it’s the end! Hello, little Meaty-Steaky Slice. [sings to music] BA Buh boo Deh BOO! [clap] Fuck yes! Right, that was fine, that wasn’t so bad. I was freakin’ out over nothing- “Follow your dreams.” MAKE. YOUR DREAMS. COME TRUE. JUST, DO IT! Good meme. Remember that one? Remember when Shia Labeouf went crazy? Well, he didn’t actually go crazy. He was basically doing that to become a meme. AHHAHow! And then everyone was like, “Oh my god, he’s so crazy,” But really, Shia Labeouf was like, “Yeah, you’re doing exactly what I wanted you to do. To think I’m crazy.” That’s basically all of what Shia Labeouf does these days. What I’m trying to say is, “Leave my boy Shia alone!” He has Shy in his name for a reason. WAhahaehe! Boing! Oh yes! I like when I can-… jump around. What? Hah! Oh god, I can barely fucking make these! HAA! Never mind, I’m awesome. Hyap! woAhoo-hoo! Keep that momentum goin’. Keep the dream alive! It’s called “Follow your dreams” for a reason! Ohh god! I need to make sure I actually have some stamina, and that I actually get a run up, BEFORE I commit to anything. THIS is a long distance without a fricken’ checkpoint! Okay, there it is. There it is. There it is. Yes! Get up, ya silly. Hahoo! Keep going, don’t even stop. Don’t stop for nothing. Don’t stop for no man! For no woman. For no dog. [splat] OHH! Okay, maybe stop for death! So that’s bullshit, you can actually miss the middle pad. And if you miss the middle pad, you die! Ohh NOO! I’m still alive. (x3) I’M. IN. BITS! Can I just jump out over these? Like this? Oh, oh! I’m still alive! Never mind. Last one. Last one, you can do it. I believe, I believe! Go, go! I almost sang the song there. [laughs] No- YES! I’m still alive! Oh, mother of god, you coulda fucked me up, bro! I got it. “Ouch.” You st- said it, Mister Steak Slice. I was gonna say “You stead it.” “You stead it, Mister Steak Stice!” [W’psh!] Ahahaha! That’s my favorite one! Just- PWMP! [laughs] I’m a huge fan- Oh god… That scared me. I’m a huge fan of just, like, obnoxiously, over the top stuff. Shocker, I know. But when stuff just hits you like that, with like a big thud or a crunch, or something, Just really fucks your shit up. Ohh, it tickles me on the inside. Okay, the end is right there. Huahaha! [sings to music] Budu de deh, boo do, beh deh buh Deh BOO! I love that song. That’s my favorite song. That’s the good one. “Blood Explosion!” Ughh. Sounds like when I had diarrhea that one time. Oh fuck. Oh fffuck. Okay, let’s see if I can do a HAH! Oh nooo. [nervous laughter] Okay, it’s fine. You’re good, you’re golden! See? Sacrifice the body! Nyuh-huh-huh. [sobs] Maybe not sacrifice it too much though. He-UGHH! FUCK! It’s okay, ’cause when you do that, When you do that, you- the bombs stay exploded. ohHHhh, we’re back at THIS nonsense, are we? This hullabaloo? Trying to drop panels underneath me again. Shame on you, game. Just shame on you. [button moans] Ouhhh… Do you like the taste of my fish, dude? [giggles] Okay, watch me fuckin’ do. Ain’t nothin’ slowin’ Jack down! Jesus, I thought I was actually gonna do it there. Ahaha! No. No, now I’m just a head! AHH! There’s shit EVERYWHERE! Okay. That’s fine, who cares? Ha! Okay. Go, gogogo, go go go, YES! HOW did you do that, my little dude?! I don’t care how ya did it. All I care is that you actually did it. Yes. [W’PSH!] Oww, oww, oww, oww. It’s just the hammer of justice. It’s fine- Can you get up? [shrill] ARE YOU DEAD?! There’s no way you’re dead. Yes, Fuck! Get up and go. Get up and- OW! Jesus. Oww, that hurt all of my bones and organs. I need SOME of them. Not all of them. I am a zombie, after all, so I can live without some of them. For a while. But if you kill them all- [PING!] OWWhahaha! [splat] That was awesome. I just went flyin’. I wanna do that again. Noo, not that one! [PING!] [laughs] [splat] That kinda shit, I love that! I dunno why. It’s so cartooney. Okay, easy does it here. Okay, easy does it. Easy does it. Could probably actually just do this. [laughs] Perfect! I just sittin’ right there in the cage, like, “Myam, myam.” [rocking out to music] WOO! Yes! This level’s called “Lava Party.” I mean, I can definitely see why. Can’t I just do this? Heheheh, fuck the system! Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh! Uh oh! Ah! I only have one leg. Is that good? I’m feeling very good about it though. [crunch] OH-hoho! Okay, I’m still alive. Apparently I can just walk down here. We all float down here. Just power walk your way through it, Jack. You got this. You’re a healthy baby boy. You can do anything you set your zombie mind to. Okay, now I just need to do this one. This one SUCKS. Okay, go. Come on! Is my body back there? No, my body’s gone forever. Well, it was nice when it lasted. It was nice having a body for a little while. I didn’t need it forever though. We had to part ways eventually. HEY! Look, it’s back! Okay, go with the hammers. Oh- That’s not with the hammers! Oh no! OH don’t hit me! Okay, okay. Okay. I’ma take my time with this. Or at least I thought I was going to. Don’t get set on fire, don’t get set on fire. Also don’t get hit by these things. GO! I don’t know! AHH! I was- I- Yeah, I knew that that wasn’t gonna work, but I just tried it anyway. [W’PSH!] FUCK! Uh oh, now I’m on fire. Being on fire is worse! Ka-hahaha! My head is not a fucking bowling ball! Look at it go! Rddddd! [laughs] YES! My little Jacker-Doo! That’s what shit is all about- Oh, fuck you game. Really? With this- [W’PSH!] Ah! Heheh, I thought that was the part I could duck. With this fucking horseshit of a level placement. Stuff. Things. Hss- NAHH!! I’m still alive! I’m still alive! I’m just a little on fire! G- Go head! My head shall survive. My head shall live on. YEAH! TAKE THAT, SOCIETY! And logic. “Wooden Demise!” Wow! Or Dim-ease. Depends on who named their child this. Oh fuck. Is this one of the ones where the wooden structures all collapse again? I fuckin’ hated those in the other game. Woah god. Okay, doesn’t seem like it. Everything actually seems pretty cool right now. I imagine these levels would be crazy if you had somebody else to play them with. Because you get the chainsaws, and you can cut each other up. I can’t destroy the platforms, can I? N-Oh god! That! That right there, that was- Dah… Okay. NOOO! You fish-footed fuck! It’s fine. (x4) Shut up, leave me aloooone! Hap, there we go, that’s nice. That’s nice, that’s upsie-doopsie. That’s flopsie-popsie. Okay, now if we just take our time, and get up here. [sigh of relief] Okay, I’m making a break for it, y’all. HAAh Superman! Pt-pt-pt-ppppt! HO! Ho! I didn’t think any of this would work! HAHAHA! My god, wEEeeee- Where am I goin’? NO! My head can make it. My head can do it all on its own. My head is amazing. [splat] My head’s a piece of shit. Look at my horse, my horse is amazing. Give it a lick, it tastes just like rasins. Huah-ho! It- It’s a fuckin’ Dickbutt on top of this! [laughs] Nice one, I’m into it. Am I going down here? Oh, but why do I have to go down here? This is fucking bad mojo! Ooh, oooh, dah! There’s fuckin’ bombs and everything down here! NOO! Okay, okay, okay. Does this count as me dead? Did I break it? Did I break the game? Am I down on the ground level when I’m not supposed to be here? Of course I fuckin’ broke the game. Of fuckin’ course I broke the game. HAH! NOOOOO! [laughs] I had it! The goal was right there! And I threw my head, and it got hit by a fuckin’ boulder! You know what that is? Boulderdash! Son of a FUCK! [PING!] Hey! You helped me! You took the sting out of my fall. Thanks buddy. Wee! Okay, this part’s easy. This part’s fuckin’ easy, bro. What’s everybody else freaking out about? Watch this shit. Watch me go! Aghh! No! What is happening?! I was freakin’ the fuck out! That means the goal is right over there. Can I break this shit? Hup, [crunch] I could almost do that. I guarantee you I could do this. HA! HAHAHAHA! Broke that shit! Oh man, that feels good! [Russian accent] Are you guys ready for “Patorra Tower 2”? Hup! I hope you are. I mean, if you’re not, then I don’t really know why we’re here. [MGSV reference]
[gruffly] “Why are we still here? Just to suffer?” “Every night, I can feel my leg. And my arm.” Okay. I got this. Can you see the steely determined focused look on my face? [intense orchestra] I don’t know about you, but that’s a long way down. [nervous laugh] Let’s just hope, that I don’t have to go back down there. Where the fuck, is a checkpoint? Can we please have a checkpoint? I’m very nervous. Is there any checkpoints in this level? Or do I just go straight to the goal? If it’s just straight to the goal, then I call absolute horse bullshit on this. Yes, “horse bullshit,” it’s when you mix breeds. Are there seriously like no checkpoints here? I have to go right to the end? I mean, you’re lucky that I am amazing at this, because otherwise, I’ve no idea what I’d do. Can I just grab a chicken and go? I heard chickens. Okay, there’s chickens right here. Grab one. Oh please, oh please. Oh please, Buddha! Oh PLEASE! YEEAH! No checkpoints! One-Run Jack! That’s what you have to call me from now on! One-Run Jack. One Jack, Jack One, One-y Jack. Wait, was that the last level? I just finished that one. That’s the last level! Awww… Well, lucky for us, there is a level editor. Which means that you can go to the Workshop, and make some maps, download some maps, play all the maps. Maps! So that’s what I might do next time then, if that was the last one. Aw man, that sucks. I was hoping that there’d be a lot more maps. It’s weird that it just chopped off like this. I thought there was gonna be like two more. Aww, what a way to end it though. There was no, like, big hurrah. Big… like story element or anything, to this one. It was just kinda going through levels, which is still fun, but part of the fun of the first game- Well, I guess it is just an added-on DLC Expansion, like multiplayer. The other one was really fun because you had like a story level. There’s just a dick and balls over here. That’s pretty neato. [laughs] Anyway! I’m gonna play some levels next time, either ones created in um… Well, I guess yeah, that’s about all I can play. ‘Cause it says “Own Maps,” but I haven’t made any yet. So I’ll play some of the ones that people have created on the Workshop. If you guys have created any levels, Try and let me know, I don’t know how we’re gonna do this. I guess if I just search Jacksepticeye Levels, we might be able to find some. I dunno, I’ll figure it out for next time, but for now… THANK you guys, so much for watching this episode. If you LIKED it, PUNCH that Like Button in the face, LIKE A BOSS! And, high fives all around. Kw-psh! Kw-psh! But thank you guys, and I will SEE ALL YOU DUDES… IN THE NEXT VIDEO!!! [“I’m Everywhere” by Teknoaxe plays] [song ends] [singing] OOh that’s dirt-y, do ya think so? Continue on the song.